His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
We had sex on a dog bed..
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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