Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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