My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
