But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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