Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
