I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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