There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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