I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
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