i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
