she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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