Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
