2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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