Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
