upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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