I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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