Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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