Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
