Kiss
Puke
Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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