so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
