That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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