is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
