at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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