Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
