Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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