Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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