I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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