Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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