Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
