I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Randomize
