he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
