btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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