I wish life had little blips of pornography
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
