It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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