Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Randomize
