Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Randomize
