im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
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