shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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