He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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