never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
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