Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
