id be glad to
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Randomize
