now i know why i became what i already was.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
