this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
