booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
