Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I'm at about main and main street
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
