I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
