I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
NoShamevember. You game?
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize