You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
