He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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