also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
